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I need to know this ASAP - I have an abusive ex boyfriend, a kid, and?

I have a very abusive ex boyfriend and have a restraining order against him. He has broken his restraining order not once, not twice, but three times. I have reported this to the police but all they have done was filed it down for future reference because his court case is coming up on January 6th. He has kept me hostage in a relationship for two years. For two years I've been trying to leave him and he keeps finding me and dragging me back. But finally he got busted for running away from the cops when I called them (right in the nick of time this time.) It was a rather big deal that day to say the least. My mind is a really big blur when it comes to what happened (because of the stress and also I am not in the best of health. I have been battling a severe illness for a very long time.) I have given counseling with him a try. Hell I even went to counseling myself because I thought I was the problem, not him. He made me believe and manipulated me into thinking that I was the one who had all the issues. Although I admit I do have a few. I am a lesbian with a slight case of g.i.ds so I'm afraid he will use that against me and try to get custody of our son. I am NOT MARRIED to this man. We are only boyfriend and girlfriend. He kept saying in the state of Montana that when you live with someone for a long time you're classified as married? Idk how that happens I think he's full of shit. But we haven't been living together since he's been busted and that's going on a month so I think he's out of luck with that excuse. But anyways, I'm sorry for my rambling. I do have an appointment with the Women's Resource Center tomorrow so I can get some help from them and hopefully get a lawyer. I just came out of the closet to my mom on Christmas and she's actually glad that I'm going to start living life how I want. I was together with that guy for three going on four years. The first year was fine. The last two turned into hell. He was already an abusive a****** before the baby was born. But after the baby he got worse and expected me to do everything while he sat on his ass and dealt drugs/did drugs with people. One of the things that makes me the most pissed off is he stole my medical marijuana just to get HIGH. He abused me into writing a letter stating that I was physically unable to go pick up my medication from my doctor, therefor he picked it up and he took half of it. And then when I couldn't pay for my meds myself he picked them up and took most of it. He tried to make me give up my Power Of Attorney, Power Of Medical Attorney, and custody of my son. Now what I want to know is, can I take my son out of state? We have no parenting plans issued by the court or anything like that yet. He is not my ex husband, he is my ex boyfriend and I also have a restraining order against him. I want to move my son and I back to Oregon because of the following reasons- My family is there. My school where I'll be attending come next fall is there. The elevation level is around 4,058 FT ft here and over there it's only 8 FT there. The elevation level causes my migraines to be worse. My family wants to help move me and my son to Canada eventually so I can get as far away from him as possible because he's a very dangerous person. So I'm going to live there first for a while, save up, and move. The GLB community is more friendly in Oregon than here in this small place and I'm also already looked down on because of my different skin color. So any advice would be appreciated. Thank you.

Public Comments

1. maybe you can call dss on him - tell them your situation - if hes abusive to you /child in the presence of child, then they can act on it and it will help with your police protection..
2. Go be with your family. Sounds like they want to help you. Why Canada, if your family is in Oregon? STAY AWAY from the manipulative ex-boyfriend - FOREVER!!! No matter what promises he makes. Get into school and learn a skill where you can support yourself and your child. Don't post anything on the internet ANYWHERE where your ex-boyfriend might be able to figure out where you are. Don't tell mutual friends of yours and his where you are. Good luck.
3. As lori, has the answer but I feel it would also be a good idea to move away as you said, in this way you and the child would be safe.
4. You need to get out of this relationship for good. Don't go back no matter what! He is going to end up serious hurting you and your child or killing both of you. You need to move away without him knowing and change your number without him knowing also. You are not just doing this for yourself you are doing this for your child. Get away from him! Remember this is not your fault! Don't let him control you any longer!